Beyond Friends Episode Eighty Seven "I Drove All Night"
"Hitchin a Ride"
Friends Guest
David Schwimmer as Ross
Rachel knocked on Chandlers door. She waited a couple of seconds and tried the door. It opened slightly then it opened all the way. Chandler was just about at the door.
"Hey." He said.
"Is she/he, whatever here?" Rachel asked remembering Stacy.
"No, she isnt. Shes looking for another place. After the well you know last week, she determined it was over between us." Chandler said. "I'm only lucky we never went all the way."
"Really?" Rachel said. "How'd that happen?"
"We came close a lot! A hell of a lot, but the she would get, oh ill, and we'd have to stop for the night.." Chandler said. "Oh shes Eddie all right. Last night she was in the corner watching me sleep. She had a little container, like a personal cooler you take to work." He said. "That is if you live on a construction site. Anyway I asked her what she had. She said after the operation she asked the doctor if she could keep something."
"Oh my god." Rachel said. "Is it what I think it was."
"It was!" Chandler said squirming. "And in remarkably good and preserved condition, for a, really gross thing in a cooler. She probably had that under the bed the entire time."
"My bed?" Rachel said. She stopped. "My OLD bed?"
"Yep." Chandler said.
"I'm gonna have to burn that now, or give it to charity. Just not giving them the REAL reason why I'm giving it up."
"Right." Chandler said. He pointed to a picture of orange juice. "Juice?"
"Did she make it?" Rachel asked.
"Nope."
"I gotta pass anyway. I'm here to ask you a favor."
"What kind of favor?" Chandler asked.
"Not that big. It's not like I'm asking you to simonize my car." Rachel explained.
"Okay, then medium big." Chandler said. "I dont even know what simonize is anyway."
"Me neither." Rachel said. "Im sure its hard." She shook her head. "I have to go upstate."
"Whats up there?"
"Other than scenery, towns and occasional cows?" Rachel asked. "A gravesite."
"Gravesite? You have family up there?" Chandler asked.
"I don't but Greta does. Shes going on a audition today. This day, every year she puts a bouquet on her parents gravesite. They died before they saw her make it big. She asked me to go for her."
"Where do I come in?" Chandler begged her to continue.
"I have no way to get there, unless I want to hitchhike and flash my leg all the way up and back." She said. "I was hoping you could take me up."
"Why me? Its not like I don't have a life." Chandler said offended.
"Well you dont have a girlfriend anymore. Technically a boyfriend." Rachel reminded him.
"Ok, but my car is in the shop." Chandler said.
"I have a rental." Rachel said. "And this." She flashed her Visa card like a lethal weapon.
"This is going to make me go?"
"Oh yea, you love this card, you're already salivating." Rachel said. "Please?"
"Okay, but its out of the good in my heart." Chandler said semi honestly.
"Nice try." Rachel said putting her card in her wallet. "I'll buy you a nice tie. Pick me at noon, we can be back before supper." Rachel said waving on her way down the stairs.
"Deal." Chandler called after her.
Later
Chandler rolled up at the front door of Rachels apartment in a taxi. Rachel stood next to a small suitcase. Chandler paid the cabbie and got out of the taxi.
"I thought this was only a short trip. Be back before dinner?" Chandler asked.
"This is for emergencies. Something might happen." Rachel explained the suitcases presence.
"Ah." Chandler said. "I got a feeling you got no clothes for me in there. He said poking it with a foot.
"Well, not clothes. It has the bouquet in there." Rachel grinned.
"Bouquet?"
"Its silk flowers. The forever lasting type. It was Gretas idea." She said. "Shall we go? The cars over here."
Chandler followed her over to the parking lot.
"Nice car." He commented on the Buick skylark.
"It was the only one available. Otherwise I would have gotten the convertable if I knew you were gonna be picky!"
"Why not the convertable?"
"My credit limit didnt allow it." She grimaced.
"Oh ok." He said. "We oughta go. I tend to turn into a pumpkin if I don't get home before midnight."
Halfway there, an hour later
The ride up had been quiet, except for Chandlers lame attempt to play a license plate game. Where they were headed, traffic wasnt a problem. No traffic, no corny car games. Rachel was grateful for at least that much. It was about halfway through the trip upstate when they decided to make conversation. Plus the radio just short circuited and the silence was murder.
"Did you love her? Him?" Rachel asked.
"Who?"
"Stacy-Eddie." She said. "Before you found out. Did you love her?"
"I don't know." Chandler said. "She was wonderful. Everything I could ever dream in a woman. Someone to watch Baywatch withouth complaining." He looked at her. "Thats what I want...in a woman." He sighed.
"Yeah?" She asked.
"Someone to talk to, like we are right now. Someone I dont have to be be Chandler Bing with. Someone I can just be me with, and they dont run down the street screaming. A person who can stand my occasionally burnt cooking." He said.
"And you thought you found that in her?" Rachel asked.
"I thought I did." Chandler said. "And now I have to start at square one again." He opened the window. "For some reason, I dont want to look anymore. I feel like I should have already found her already."
Rachel looked down.
"Is he talking about me? Or something else?" She wondered to herself. Chandler looked at her. "I'm afraid to ask."
"It was kind of strange. How long she thought she could go without being caught. There is one good thing about this, if you can believe it." Rachel said assuringly.
"What?" Chandler askd, interested.
"At least you found out before the My girlfriend is my old guy roomate special on Jerry Springer." She smiled.
Chandler looked at her and laughed. "Yeah. There is that."
Gretas hometown
"Wow, this is such a small place." Rachel said as they drove through. "A gas station, a couple of houses, and the cemetary."
"At least we wont get lost here." Chandler said as they pulled up to the parking area in front of the cemetary.
Rachel grabbe the case and pulled the flowers out. They walked up to the two solitary graves in front.
"These are it." Rachel said.
"Wow. Again." He said.
Rachel laid the flowers on the dirt and looked at them for a second.
"I wonder if anyone would do this for me." Rachel said. She looked at Chandler.
"Sure." Chandler wrapped his arm around her. "How can they not?"
"Yeah." Rachel said. "I'm sure someone will remember me."
"I know I will." He thought to himself. They piled back into the car.
"Do you smell something?" Chandler asked as he started the car.
"Greta said theres a smelt plant up here." She replied. "Must be what it is."
"Yeah." Chandler said as they pulled away.
Back at the halfway point
Chandler whiffed the air. "I still smell that awful smell." He reported.
"Me too," Rachel pulled her shirt over her nose. "pull over, there must be something wrong."
Chandler pulled the car over to the side of the road. He didnt even have to turn the ignition off, the car stalled on its own.
"Oh man." Chandler said turning the key. He stopped when he got a few ominous grinding sounds from under the hood. "What do we do now?"
"I don't know." She got out of the car with Chandler. He popped the hood. Billows of hot stingy steam came out. They stepped back.
"I think we've found the problem." Chandler said as the steam started to recede. "The cars a piece of crap."
"What a diagnosis, I didnt know you were a mechanic." Rachel said. "You're right anyway. What do we do? We're a long way from home."
"I don't know. Maybe we will get some kind of sign." Chandler said. "We'll just have to walk to a phone and hope someones home at your place."
Rachel gathered her bag. She was about to lock the door.
"What are you doing? No ones going to steal a clunker." Chandler said.
"I know, but this might not look good on my credit record."
"Ok." Chandler said, not totally understanding her.
She caught up with him on the side of the road.
"Did you remember seeing a gas station?" She asked.
"Nope, nothing but nothing out here." He said. "What else could happen to us?"
Thunder boomed in the sky. Rain started to fall slowly and then into a torrential downpour.
"You had to ask!" Rachel hit him with her fist.
"Come on. There was a barnhouse out here." He pointed.
They quickly ran through the field to a red abandoned barnhouse.
"Great, you don't recall a gas station, but you recall some Amish reject of a barnhouse." Rachel said as they entered it.
"Seems pretty cozy, airtight, watertight." Chandler said. "It must have closed recently because there is some stuff still here."
"Hmm." Rachel said, "Suddenly I'm a little cold." She said.
"No wonder you're soaked to the bone here." He looked over at a pile of old clothes in a corner. "We got to get you out of those clothes."
"What about you?" Rachel asked.
"I'm fine." He said. He grabbed a big blanket. "Here wrap yourself in this. Theres some old clothes you can change into, I think they might fit."
Rachel ducked into a horse stall. Chandler gathered up a gown. He walked back over and stopped short. He watched as Rachel peeled her drenched clothes off of her. She didnt seem to be aware that he was there. He stepped back further and turned his back as more came off. It was so weird to watch and yet so beautiful to him. She came around the corner wrapped in the horse blanket. Her face was glistening wet from the rainwater. She handed him the clothes.
"Here." She said taking the gown.
"Its not a Gucci gown, but its close enough."He said as she turned the corner to put it on. It was hard but he resisted the urge to look at her again. He laid out the clothes to dry on a stable wall. Rachel emerged with the gown on. It was three sizes too large.
"Has it stopped raining yet?" She asked.
"No. If it keeps up, we might be here all night." He said.
"We'll need a place to sleep then." She said. "Don't most farmers sleep in the barnhouse?"
"Maybe the insominiacs." Chandler said. "There was a bed in the corner when we entered." He took her hand and led her too it. "It's getting dark." He said. "I took the liberties of lighting some lanterns."
"Thanks. I don't like the dark that much." She confessed.
"You can sleep here." Chandler said as Rachel crawled onto the bed. "I'll be over here."
"No." Rachel grabbed his hand. "Stay here with me. I don't want to be alone in a strange place." She said her grip tight on his hand. "We'll be all right."
"We're adults." Chandler agreed sitting on the bed. "We can be here and not be here together."
"Right." Rachel said. There was a loud thunderclap. She grabbed Chandler around the waist. "That was pretty loud."
"You're gonna be all right." Chandler kissed her on the head. "All storms end, and the sun always comes up."
"That was nice." She said and looked into his eyes. "Why arent you a writer?"
They sat there for an eternity looking at each other. They didn't even blink.
The next day
Rachel checked on her clothes. they were perfectly dry. The hay that was underneath them soaked the water up. She quickly got dressed. Chandler stirred, and pulled a shirt on. He thought for a minute, he didnt recall taking it off.
"Do you want to go to the gas station now?" Chandler called to Rachel.
"You're gonna hate me, but I had a cell phone in here all the time, I guess I forgot."
Chandler shook his head at her. She shrugged.
"Who did you call?" He asked.
"Ross. He ought to be here in a while. I think he might get 15 speeding tickets on the way up here, but he'll make it." Rachel said.
"Good." Chandler said as they walked outside. "God its a beautiful day."
"Yes, it is." Rachel said. "It really is."
Ross showed up a few minutes later.
"Hi honey, sorry I was late." He kissed her on the cheek. "Did I miss anything?"
"Nothing much, right Chandler?" Rachel asked him.
"Nope." He replied. "Not a damn thing."
