Beyond Friends Episode Sixty Five "I'm Moving Out"
Friends Guest Stars
Matt LeBlanc
Lisa Kudrow
Courteney Cox
David Schwimmer
Special Guest
RuPaul as Greta Chanel
"Moving On Up"
Rachel had just set her bags down inside the front door when Chandler came up and gave her a big hug.
"Howdy stranger!" He said letting go.
"Hey." Rachel said.
"I'm glad to see you. I just had to give you a big hug. Hope thats all right. After all you ARE Mrs Rachel Geller now."
"It was all right. I think one of my lungs collapsed but it was worth it." Rachel said sitting down. Chandler picked up her bags. She watched him throw them into her room, landing with precision on her bed. Then they tumbled off onto the other side.
"Oh no." Rachel thought to herself. "I gotta tell Chandler I'm moving out in a couple of days to Ross's place. But how am I going to tell him? I cant do it now." She reasoned. "I don't want to be a downer when I just got back from the trip."
"Hey, wheres Ross?" Chandler asked.
"Oh he had to go to a certain sister." Rachel said. "She blabbed about the news before we were able to get back to the mainland."
"It wasnt her." Chandler said. "It was her parents."
"My new mom in law." Rachel said. "Great."
"I know." He said. "A storm? How could you have not known about the evacuation?"
"First of all it was off season. During a busy on-season they would have looked for us a little better than they did. Ross considered suing or something. I talked him out of it." Rachel shrugged. "So did I miss anything?"
"Believeably?" He asked. "Not a damn thing. Joey and the others are coming over today. Apparently some big episode of his show is gonna be on today and he isnt letting anyone know whats going on. Not even Greta down the hall would tell us anything."
"Did you see Greta a lot when I was gone?" Rachel asked strolling into her room.
"Shes good for opening mayonaise jars." Chandler said.
"Chandler?" Rachel said. "I gotta tell you something."
"What?" Chandler said.
"You may want to sit down for this."
"I'm sure I'm all right." Chandler said. He paused. "Of course you never know." And he took a seat on her bed.
"I'm moving out in a few days, to Ross's apartment." Rachel said. "I didn't know how to tell you this. I thought you wouldnt understand."
"How can I not understand?" Chandler said standing up. "You're married now. You have to be with your husband." He said. "Its perfectly understandable."
"Great. I had no idea you would take it this well given...well...our history." Rachel said sighing.
"That was a great time." Chandler agreed. "Different time, different people. What the hell, it might have even worked out."
"True." Rachel said.
"I'll even help you." Chandler said. "I been finding a way to get you out of here for months anyway." He said wryly.
"I appreciate it." Rachel said. "Why not, we're here already. Why not do a inventory."
"Fine by me." Chandler said. "Assumedly you wont need the bed."
"Oh no." Rachel said. "Everything else can come with me." She said.
"Well that was easy." Chandler said. He followed Rachel out of the room.
Later
The gang had gathered to watch a special primetime edition of "Days of our restless children" the soap on which Joey was a star. He had gathered all of his friends, and invited Greta along for the night of fun.
"Is this the first primetime episode they ever had?" Rachel asked Joey as they sat on the couch together.
"Oh yeah. They think it will be a great ratings boost. And we need that right now." Joey said. "I may not know much but I know ratings have alot to do with whether I go to work tomorrow morning."
"Isnt one of the characters supposed to die?" Monica asked.
"Yeah." Joey said. "But we have no idea who."
"Hows that possible?" Pheobe asked. "You were like there when it was filmed, right?"
"True, doll." Greta interuppted. "They filmed several different endings to it. Its referred to as the JR Effect." She said. When she got a look at all of their clueless faces she sighed and explained. "On Dallas, there for five resolutions for the Who shot JR mystery. A different ending for each character who might have killed JR on the show."
"Oh yeah." Rachel said. "I remember that too. There was some other show that did that too. Something about a wedding...I dunno." She shook her head.
"It's starting!" Chandler said.
"All right." Joey said sitting on the couch. Greta fetched her bowl of chips and bean dip.
"Remember my characters this guy." He said he said pointing to a man,. His name was Dr Jason Godfrey.
"Ok, all right." Ross said looking at everyone else with the "How dumb does he think we are?" look.
Dr Jason Godfrey was pouring himself some brandy from an elegant container when the scene began. He sniffed the brandy in the glass and was about to sip it when he was interuppted.
"So, you have the nerve to show your face around here again." An elderly man said as he appeared on camera. "I personally thought scum liked you crawled under the rock from which you came once you have done your dirty work."
"Speaking of scum." Jason said dramatically. "You're getting it all over my carpet."
"You are living in my house as part of my considerable genorsity." The man sniffed. "I let you have anything you wanted to. And you certainly did, didn't you? You helped yourself to my wife and to my daughter then to the daughter I didnt know I had till last year."
"Wow, you're a pig!!" Phoebe said.
"Oh yes. I've certainly run the gamut." Jason said holding up his glass. "Cheers."
"Your run ends here." The man said brandishing a gun. Joeys character didnt look at all surprised at the motion.
"What are you gonna do, shoot me? You NEED me." He barked.
"Not anymore." The man said and fired a single shot that shattered the glass in Joeys hand. Then he fired a second shot the killed him. Dramatic music played into the commercial break.
The party at the couch sat shocked.
"Bean dip anyone?" Greta offered, not looking at any one person.
Minutes later
Joey was on the phone. He was talking to his agent.
"I can't believe they killed him off!" Chandler said to Rachel.
"I know. But Greta said they had several different endings." She turned to her.
"Yeah. Rudopho kills him, I kill him, the maid kills him. The family dog kills him. Either way he was a dead man." Greta said uneasily. "I like my ending better. I am like frenching him when the gun in my purse goes off. Unrealistic of course, but what can you do?"
Joey got off the phone finally.
"Oh honey." Rachel hugged him. "I'm so sorry about what happened."
"Hey, its all right. It's just another job." Joey said. "My agent said I might get another one right away."
"Theres no chance of Dr Jason Godfrey coming back to life, is there?" Chandler asked patting him on the shoulder.
"Oh no. I was not a fan favorite at the end. Don't forget. I threw an old girlfriend in a bullpen with cows with mad cow disease last week. It was only a matter of time. I'm just surprised they did it like that. At the beginning. No murder mystery. Hell that guy is not even going on trial. Probably get a nobel prize." He said. "I'm gonna go now." Joey went out the door without another word.
"He's more hurt than he says he is." Monica said as she walked over to the group with Greta.
"You're telling me?" Chandler asked. "He's getting more sarcastic than I am." He sputtered.
"What do we do?" Phoebe said.
"I'm afraid theres nothing we can do right now." Ross said.
"Oh well, heres hoping." Rachel said.
